Kamal Ghorui
The decision to move back to India after years abroad is rarely simple. For many professionals who have spent a significant part of their adult lives in the US, the idea of returning is weighed down by fears of regression, poorer infrastructure, pollution, bureaucracy, work culture, and a perceived loss of quality of life. Online forums are filled with strong opinions on both sides, often painting the choice as a difficult one. Likewise, earlier this year, one Reddit user (Classic_Ad1336) shared his experience of moving back to India after seven years in the US, and offered a balanced note on expectations versus reality. The post, as usual, resonated with many who were indeed grappling with the same decision. He shared, “Moved back to India after 7 years in the US. My experience so far…” According to him, he wanted to come back because of lots of reasons. He shares, “I couldn’t see myself settling there, the visa hamster wheel, my parents getting old. I didn’t come back with rose-tinted glasses. A lot of the concerns people raise here are real: AQI is bad, hygiene, civic sense and littering on the roads, infrastructure is uneven, bureaucracy can be frustrating. Those aren’t imaginary problems, and I’m not trying to downplay them. I was told by my friends and family not to move back, and that I’ll regret moving back.”
Giving suggestions always seems easy, but the actual hurdle lies in implementing it in real life. He shared that as he moved back reality was far more practical. Instead of constantly thinking ‘this country is broken,’ he is going with the flow… living, working, meeting people, moving around, dealing with annoyances when they come up, and enjoying certain things like food, hanging out with family and friends, convenience of getting stuff done in the house like cooking and cleaning, with no more stupid visa worries.Well, staying abroad has both pros and cons. He pushed back against the idea that the challenges faced abroad are somehow lesser or easier to tackle. He shared, “I faced issues in Houston as well — homelessness, gun violence, racism, missing family and traffic in Houston is no joke despite the 8 lane highways. Heck I didn’t feel safe roaming there at night in certain neighborhoods. So while there as well I had to find a way to work around these issues and go on living my day to day.”He agreed that he is not claiming this will be everyone’s experience, or that India doesn’t have serious issues. He was just sharing his views that for him the gap between online narratives and reality has been noticeable, in a way that he didn’t fully expect before returning.However, one thing he was sure about which is, “So far I haven’t regretted my decision of moving back and I don’t intend to go back to the US anytime soon.”
He said, “As far as work-life balance is concerned for my line of work, I haven’t noticed a meaningful difference compared to the US. Long hours and blurred boundaries exist there too…Same with traffic — congestion and stressful commutes are a reality in large US metropolitans as well… Bengaluru traffic doesn’t feel that unfamiliar or unique to me.” For all those contemplating a similar move, apart from sharing that reality an expectation can be very different, and also whether one wants to stay in the US or move back should be a personal choice, and not something driven by online narratives or general trends.People also seemed to agree with him. While agreeing with him, one shared that life is such, when you live in the US, you enjoy what it has to offer and navigate its challenges; when you live in India, it’s the same approach. No point fighting reality, study it, adapt to it, play the game according to its rules.Others also echoed the idea that constant comparison, in either direction, often leads to dissatisfaction.The discussions that happen around relocation debates, there is no objectively correct choice. There is only the choice that aligns best with one’s priorities, tolerance for uncertainty, and definition of a good life, something no online narrative can fully decide for you.
