Kamal Ghorui
Actor-dancer Nora Fatehi got candid about her personal life in a recent conversation, opening up about growing up with a single mother, dealing with “daddy issues,” and how it continues to impact her relationships.When asked if being raised by a single mom affected her relationship with men, Nora didn’t hold back. “Yeah. Oh my God, so much. Let’s talk about daddy issues. I have daddy issues—I really do,” she told Lilly Singh.She went on to explain the larger cultural context, adding, “Like in a lot of brown families, it’s hard to get them to understand us… we’re a different generation—we have different goals, we want to do things differently, our mentality is different.”Talking about immigrant households, she said, “All my friends have this issue—not just me… They try to hold you close, and that comes from a place of protection. But then you start to battle with what you’re learning outside… you come back home and it feels like a completely different world.”She added that this duality can be mentally taxing. “That can really challenge you mentally when you’re trying to find yourself… there’s always that fear—how are they going to feel, what are they going to say?”
‘He disappeared… you start to resent men’
Opening up about her parents’ separation, Nora shared, “They got a divorce, and he kind of just disappeared for the longest time.”She admitted that the experience shaped her emotional responses. “When you see that and you grow older, you start to resent men and the way they treat women.”While she acknowledged meeting “a lot of great men,” she said the deeper impact stayed. “When you have daddy issues, it turns into abandonment issues. If someone doesn’t want to be with you… it’s really hard on you. It’s hard to move on.”Reflecting on past relationships, she said, “I’ve been with people who weren’t good for me… but I didn’t take breakups easily because I hadn’t resolved my abandonment issues.”Nora added with striking honesty, “You think, ‘It’s not a him problem—it’s a me problem.’ But it also is kind of a him problem, because it comes from a man.”She continued, “I still deal with that, to be honest… I’m still trying to figure out how to navigate relationships with men because I do have unresolved issues with my dad.”
‘It took my mom 14 years to leave’
When asked if there was shame around divorce, Nora said, “Yeah… actually, not anymore. Now everyone is getting divorced.”She then revealed a deeply personal detail. “It took my mom 14 years to leave my dad. Fourteen years. Not four, not five—fourteen.”Explaining why, she said, “My grandma, my aunts—everyone kept telling her, ‘Just be patient.’ You know that mindset—‘Log kya kahenge?’”Questioning that societal pressure, Nora added, “We worry so much about ‘people’… but who are these people? They’re not paying your rent… they’re not there when you’re sick.”She acknowledged generational differences, saying, “They came from a different mentality where there was shame attached to divorce—‘What will people think?’”
‘Women should have a backup to protect their peace’
Reflecting on what she learned from her mother’s journey, Nora emphasised independence. “I think that’s why it’s so important for a woman to take care of herself, to have a backup, to have a solid foundation.”She added, “Even if she chooses to be with a man… if anything goes wrong, she should be able to pick herself up and leave to protect her mental peace.”Nora concluded by pointing out the harsh reality many women faced. “A lot of women weren’t able to do that… so they stayed in situations they didn’t want to be in because they felt like, ‘What will I do if I leave? I don’t have a backup.’”
