7 patterns of couples who ended up in divorce or in breakup, therapist reveals

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“One partner was much more invested in the relationship than the other. They wanted to talk it out, plan things together, and work to change, but their partner was shut down and showed little interest,” she said, and rightly so! Lopsided love drains—chaser burns out, avoider checks out. Constant emotional labour (like planning, probing, placating) breeds resentment. Couples in balanced relationships share their load through mutual check-ins, and equal effort. Meanwhile, emotionally shutting down signals disinterest.

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